To learn what #30days is all about, click HERE.
Today's topic is: 'A time you thought about ending your own life.'
Today's topic is a tough one, but I feel like the majority of people have come to a point in their life and thought 'I really hate who I am, and I want to die.' Maybe not exactly in those words, but you get the point.
This time for me was in eighth grade.
Eighth grade was a doozy. It really threw me for a loop. So many things happened while I was in eighth grade that I have never really talked about with anyone. Not even my family. With that said, I'm not going to relish here on my blog about it. To be honest, I don't particularly like to think about that time, let alone share it. Maybe someday I'll tell you that story.
I will tell you this.
I was really depressed. I took everything to heart. I didn't have anyone I could trust. I thought, "What if I just died?" a lot that year. I didn't think anyone cared. I felt bullied. I was really, really sad.
I'm not completely sure why I didn't ever kill myself. Something stopped me every single time I thought about it. I'm lucky for that. So many people kill themselves because they feel as if they have no one and nothing to lose. It saddens me to think about.
Since I'm being completely honest (I like to think that my little piece of the internet here is just that), I put this #30days post til last minute because I have never felt completely ready to share it. Even now. Even after three years. I also didn't know what to say.
All I know is that I don't what anyone feeling sorry for me. I don't want you to pity me. I have not had the thought to kill myself or wish to die in a while, and I don't want people spending time feeling bad for me. That's not what I want.
I do want you to think about what you say before you say it. I do want you to be compassionate towards people, whoever it may be, because you don't know their story. I do want you to think. I do want you to be considerate.
And trust me, I know that it may seem difficult some days, especially when you're upset or irritated, but try. You might surprise yourself.
Feel free to leave a comment on the above topic.
HW<3
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